umm every day has good spots well not spots exactly but a variation of bad and good my ptsd is loads worse at the mo but always is at the run up to christmas but deep breaths and carry on my big hope is my ptsd will be treated next year and can walk round with out this ierodzjfkfv coming in to my head ( swear swear )
massive effort to go out to christmas quiz convinced same questions every year always think shld keep piece of paper and check on this not kidding always get that one about the christmas card and when was the first one sent and who brought the christmas tree over . my ptsd did subside eyyyy doing this think got something to do with subconscious / conscious mind and felt in good mood ( miracles do happen at christmas but not long after it was back as deciding what sport shop to get dads sport bag errr to big to small just right this is turning into weird version of 3 bear well got it and if don’t like it ” No/one ever said life wld be easy !!!
I had decided to go to carol service with candles surprised health and safety allow this especially with me in the crowd but still mum and dad normally make an appearance but mum has lost voice ( talks to much ) but was not impressed when told the holy people she could not make it at home with the whiskey!!!
asd per usual packed out but got seat by pleasant man and had a bit of a competion how many of our relatives came to the church !!!!! and then the candle came round with holy man telling people to shout out if had any trouble ( glance my way \) !!!! remembered me from last year then when shouted out ouch in the middle of silent night !!!!
I think they should give candle holding lessons as one year my candle became so big it was like an inferno and man behind me asked it i was related to the devil well this year was the opposite as became as the wick became smaller smaller til began to burn hand so despite thinking of the celebrity jungle programme and biting through pain decided to blow out this left one big problem could not see!!!! ummm u would think being the christmas season the man with his brightly lit candle would share his but noooooo he cradled his candle and when asked if cld share his carol service NOOOOOh never mind it was great fum doing gymnastics trying to see and felt bit better abt my self hearing lady behind say she was going to blow her candle out before her coat went on fire .
oh well u had to laugh, was in good mood mr humbug man mumbled something abt not being share his light ( likely story !!!!! ho ho the greatest gift u can be given is a sense of humour and ability to laugh , at times today was one hell of a state and if wondering i did at times turn to invictus I am the master of my fate yer cld have got really upset tonight but just laugh gave me something to blog abt !!!! ho ho