mondays r not the only blue day

I must  admit   i did   not realise  til  half  way through the  day   that  this   was  blue  monday  where   i read   about  it in  the  library .  find  it  quite   difficult to believe    that this   is the  most    depressing   day of the  year when  we   are only   17 days  I am     quite  th

sure    their will be  worse  or better  day   ahead  !!!

well  that  line  (should not have  moved but   can’t be  bothered  moving  it now) the whole concept of   blue monday was   decided    upon by a   travel company who  said  the  combination of  bad weather  unpaid bills   christmas a distant  memory   (  good ) makes it a blue day  !!

Any how   my day  was going  well   was looking  forward  to starting   2 gents  at   Birkenhead library   (  not  kidding   reading  Shakespeare   is  FUN  } and the more  u read of   the  bard  the  more  u get  as   his   comedy   tend to repeat   in you  anyhow i digress   AGAIN

I have an   appointment   tomorrow     hoping  to sort   my head   out with my ptsd   but not holding breath  that  it is the  emdr   as   on the letter   says   going to  be  cbt again sos   but  this does  not work  on me but  I am  the  master of my fate  and will continue  fighting  (  famous last  words  ) when my mum   goes  on that sometimes  i put my   happy face on  and people   do   realise  what going  through  but  to my mind  alot of people know  i am ill  but being   with  understanding   view points    make me  forget    my problems for an  hour and of course if   been  waiting for years   for  help  really not going to  go in and  say everything   fine am  I

I  actually think my mum  is jealous that  I get on with various  people  and not really  with her  , maybe  i am  to close   to home  well   she tends  to  irritate    me  every time  opens mouth  ( this is  a slight  exaggeration)  but still  .

I must admit   blood  sugars were  very high  prob  due to stress  as  not eaten that much   but   i knew this  as thought out    reading  grp  i drank   gallons of tea  in massive  mug so  much   we  ran  out of  milk !!!! so maybe   this   day is turning  rather  blue   but as   an evertonian i see  nothing    wrong  with the  term   blue  day  !!!! (digressing again  we had  a  good  and  rare win yesterday ) !!!!!

any how came home  and  bloods  were  really high  surprise  surprise  not  i was   going to  go  to singing  cafe    which i  love to do as lightens my mood   but could imagine   mum  saying  ” see  u  r happy now  yer  for an hour and a bit   so  not much out of day  so  decided   not to go !!  umm  on reflection  cutting off nose  to spite  face springs again  to mind.

so on the  whole  a  rather  bad   day but  today my blood  machine been  yelling at me hi  hi hi   no not  saying  hello  just  letting me  know bloods  high as  kite   best    leave this prattle  and take more  insulin  huh

Tomorrow  is    another  day   ha  I am the  master of my fate and the  captain of  my soul

oh yer  a proverb  The   blueness of a wound   cleans  away  the  evil !!!!

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About loubyjo

I have all my life been fascinated by words and books especially I used to have this strange idea that I could read every book in the world well maybe just 80% of them . My life can at times be really stressful as suffer my brains wires are all wonky which results in me having aspergers syndrome thats probably where all my crazy ideas spill out from !!!IIIalso have ocd which results in my thoughts getting stuck in my head causing me lots of distress , but hey what is perfection and if i ever met a perfect person it would probably send me fast asleeP AND YOU AS WELL SO iIam hoping to use this blog to let you lnow what it is like to be me !! in the last few years also discovered got ptsd this is were most of probs stem from
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