I have been reading lately various articles / on ptsd and how although ptsd kind of damages the neurons in the brain and kinda makes u feel living in a loop system imagine the same though t wooshing round like a washing machine and u just can’t stop it bit like the time went to laundrette and put the money in the wrong machine and just stood their helplessly as the empty machine filled with water ( well nought i cld do only just pause and think wont do that again in a hurry most expensive wash of clothes ever !! ( told u before just living a life of fiascos !!0
Any how I digress !!! i have been reading that having ptsd affect the body more than what people think leading to various problems alarm bells were ringing all over the place when read total stress of living with ptsd can bring on heart prob OOOOOOOH NOOOOOOOOO
AFTER having probs with the osephogeous last November might as well blame ptsd for that as well ( nothing to do with me drinking gallons of coffee ) i was asked to go for a hear scan were they claim to have found strange object in the heart , not sure what meant by strange first thought maybe something swollowed as kid but surely i wld remember that but sounds like a long tube like thing which is brighter in colour at the end and is waving about ( really i dont like sci fi only ET and it sounds like his finger )
Any how i was due to go last week for a detailed scan called a TOE ummm mind boggles , but do try not to read to much in to various health probs as head would never stop boggling . The strange odd thing was my appoinment was for 1.30 middle of the day so what u think but to type 1 brittle diabetic (blood sugar like a rollercoaster this was just a diaster waiting to happen i rang various diabetic people only to be told oh u will be fine have a big breakfast early morning then rest no probs umm ok you,re the boss but with hindsight and knowing what happens next i shld have NO need to be seen first things other wise will collapse as I am the master of my fate I am the Capatain of my soul but no i went along with the so called professionals who think they know best !!!!!!!!!
WEll no prizes for what happened next I began to feel dizzy and wooshy feeling just imagine how u feel when drunk and i mean drunk times it by 10000 and u have it and just lay on the bed and then shouted to parents ” tell them i cant do this ever again no more scans nothing rant rant and more ranting . my dad was getting me more annoyed telling me to eat something ” I CANT COS this scan says not to ) so in the end all trundled off into car including 6 year old niece who was staying “lou not well nought to worry abt so somehow got to the ward although it was FEBRUARY i felt like it was AUGUST in TRINIDAD and my mum kept saying “keep your clothes on well it dont have to be Enisten to realise what the Nurses did next was to take one look and gave me sugary drink and toast and hung around waiting for the blood to rise up from two hey ho !!!!!
I recover very quickly from these kind of hypo attacks but not much good today with Drs going to calamity mode “shes eaten so will have reschedule her in the AM can’t have a diabetic coming in the afternoon !1 errrrr yer thats what i said in the first place so with a quick cup of tea and 15 mins later back with niece “told u the hosi would make the better “” Eva looked a picture of horror and amazement |( one day i will learn how to put photos on this and brighten it up but anyhow the moral of little ditty story what ever I know myself more than any professional and really speaking should have made more of a fuss cos in the long run better for everyone if i had stuck to my guns i would not be waiting even longer to see what is happening in my heart and the NHS would not have reschedule the appointment actually i am amazed that it is not common procedure to put people who are diabetic first in such a situation people think we are fussing when we say need to eat little and often but it is alot easier in the long run everyone knows the saying “women and children first ( that is the Birkenhead law thing claim to fame i live in Birkenhead 0 but hospitals and other such establishments shld say “let the diabetic go first ) oh well the anticipation wait got a new date for the middle of March to see wether ET has left his finger behind !!!
Out of the night that covers me black as the pit from pole to pole ( yer sure it will be fine !!!