We are all different thank God

Dont know   why but thinking a lot  about the word    delegation   strange  word   to keep   popping  into my head  but  prob   think   comes   from the  story somewhere in the bible   God knows  where  (he does  know)  were it claims all the   bits in the  body are  needed  !! even the    finger nail  is important    the other  day I had  a so-called  paper cut and yes it  was painful and could not   use my finger  for  awhile and yes   i did   miss  the use of  it  .

As  a  child  most of my memories  of doing the  majority of activities  art, sport , music   dancing  more or less  anything  was “oh u will  make a mess    and would  always   be the last  to be chosen  in any team   game !!!   a story  that must  ring   true  with so many people   my mum has roughly the  same memories as  kid  so do   most people who are not   sporty   or  arty !!  or a talent    that is    blindingly  obvious  !!

I  never won  any  thing at  sport and  was always the last to be   chosen ( boohoo)  til    around about  the  age of  11    when  in stead  of doing  silly beanbag   races   or  little  runs it was decided  our class  would   run  all the  way  round the  sports   field    this   was a good   800  metres or more   well   miracles   do happen   i won the  race   feet   hands  down     much to the  amazement   to everyone including  myself     ”  how  did   u do that  as  i won  numerous other   races   i had no idea    and  just think it   was something i could  naturally  do  middle  distance   running  i have always been  slim  and    bit   of   a day dreamer  so    sprinting   was no good to me  as i was  still at the  beginning    whilst everyone else had finished   but  this  was   slower  to get   going   and    alot of  winning  was  down to tactics  always   remembering the   tortoise wins the  race not the   hare     alot of people    are always  in a rush but i like to  take my  time    so  in a race   i would     start  off   slowly and concentrate  on   getting   past  the person in front  of me   til their  was  no one   left to overtake   great  fun   and  found  it  easy  up to a point  !!

I  believe   everyone is  good at    something  and   should  all make  the  most of   what  we have   a few  years   after    winning  various  races     the   fun out of running  began  to diminish  as my reputation  began to follow me about  ” u  r so  good    u can beat     anyone  err maybe   but  was happy  just running   and the pressure   began to get to me , about the  age of  13  i was    becoming  skinnier  and skinnier  and    although  i lived    2 minutes   away from  the  high school i was  exhausted  by time   got their    i could   hardly  crawl   never made run   but no one   listened    if u  did not  have  a note  from   your parents   u had to do PE
I will  never  forget  the day i pleaded  with  the PE teacher   that  i was   not well  enough to run but   would not  listen and people  crowded   around to  watch me  run   and  so lined  up ready to  go and  bang        few  cms  in it seemd  and  wa son the floor  ” cant  u see  she’s ill   rang  round the  field  and the  teacher  was  extremely worried  as   i  mustered   up enough  energy to   get changed  abd  then announced  i was going  home  and crawled out  of   school   to wait for  my parent  to come home  the   symptoms   were  all their   weight loss   thirst   like being in  desert   yer i was diabetic   bit later  i had  gone the  drs and   was   in a hosi   ward   with     nurses   saying  to my parents   ”  she is   so thin   did u not  notice   ”  well  no they did  not  as  they were to busy    ( that’s  another  story )

MY point  is    i cant understand   why the   PE teacher   not have listened  to me  when  told  her not  well enough to run and  why  when u find   you are    relatively good at  something   does all the   fun have to go  out  of it  the pressure  i feel  from   people  in my year was   incredible ”  lets   watch lou run”  i just  liked  it   cos  i could   do it  which looking  at  it was   quite  remarkable   i  was  good at  any sport  seeing  dyspraxic  and all fingers   and  toes all  over  the place if  anyone   was   going to  trip   it would be   me  but   i ran in a strange way  my feet  out in a limbo   people  used to  call  me Charlie   Chaplin  cos i walk with  my feet kinda  out   !!! but   i think it was the pressure of   finding out  that  was   good   at something  that  kinda   stopped me  running  i did not want  to be  an athlete  i  just ran  cos liked   it and could think !!!  whilst doing it !!

The main love of my life  is  reading and  maybe    writing  ( mate  told me  i  do my facebook posts like   Virginia  wolff   stream of consciousness  thingy i just think it and write   it   and if  u knew me  that  how i talk  just think  and say  !!! ha )

my parents  and other people would  do anything   to stop me   reading   wanting me  to go  out   and go on holidays  and enjoy the  world  but i could    enjoy the  world   from reading  a book without  the hassle of  moving   a muscle  !!!

“you cant  make a life  out of  reading ” ” their   is a big world  out their   why dont    u go out  in it    COS I AM  HAPPY IN BIRKENHEAD ”  that   y !!!!!!

PEople   who don’t  read  / write   can’t    really understand  what u get out of   it  but   i can escape  from  being me and  go where   ever i choose   .  I have  been  kinda involved with a reading  charity  The  reader org (if cld  blog properly i would  out it  up so cld  find  it out  for  yourself    were  read books  together   and found  my own place in life   without  causing  me much  hassle really  .

Tomorrow  i will  help run  a reading  grp  were   we  read plays i tend to    be the  main leader   in a very laid  back  way with a mate   i  met  through the group  helping me out  but their  is one thing  i am hopeless at    and will always will be   that is   the  catering side   making people  drinks etc   ahhhh does my head  in  to much  milk  not   enough   3  sugars   no sugar    ahhhhhh do it yourself !!!! but no  what is the lesson to be learnt   from all my prattle  is   we are all good  at something    so have  delegated  the  tea making  to my mate  Dave  who  enjoys the  teamaking  and is  able to do it without  losing his  rag so to  speak

he  told  me awhile   back   he  could  not do  what I do  ensure  everyone in the   reading   grp   has a part  and   if want to  say something   do so , i find  it   relatively easy mainly  cos   i  like the people   just   as he  finds the  tea making   two   totally different  things  that make the  book grp  a success  well kind of dont   do pressure   !!!!! so basically  everyone is needed  and all  u have to do  is   delegate  for all  to  be happy .

“Dave  u have put  far   too much milk in my  tea  puke !!!!! ( never mind)





About loubyjo

I have all my life been fascinated by words and books especially I used to have this strange idea that I could read every book in the world well maybe just 80% of them . My life can at times be really stressful as suffer my brains wires are all wonky which results in me having aspergers syndrome thats probably where all my crazy ideas spill out from !!!IIIalso have ocd which results in my thoughts getting stuck in my head causing me lots of distress , but hey what is perfection and if i ever met a perfect person it would probably send me fast asleeP AND YOU AS WELL SO iIam hoping to use this blog to let you lnow what it is like to be me !! in the last few years also discovered got ptsd this is were most of probs stem from
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