Today has been an okish type of day no big disasters to report and met up with some friends for a general chat , their was 5 of us in total and think we had all various struggle in life which made me think of so called friend maybe that is pushing it who is seems to have no empathy with other people struggles being on the asd spectrum say i am like that but think that is open to debate but catherine compared to me seems to have no adventures no stories of getting wrong train, leaving bag with dosh on bus or just simply falling over the kerb and breaking leg so having nice house and job but to me nothing to strive for and i get bored with her very quickly !
Another person i know got the majority of A* in exams and throughout her life but went quite hysterical as got a B once !!! as just could not cope with not being top !!!
I have a hand ful of gcse and not bad grades but tended to get most of them bit by bit not all in one go and concentred on subjects that i enjoyed like psychology and some strange thing welfare and society !!!!! but the subject i failed at surprise surprise was English lit I had missed an awful lot of school as became diabetic when 13 and was badly bullied so alot of time just used to stay off as was so much easier
I taught myself english and on the day on the exam was not well in the exam and told no one just kind of dozed off resulting in D or could have been an e i was not that bothered but the english teacher was so upset but i just enjoy reading the stories and plays not really interested in remembering quotes that means nothing but a couple of years later i was at college i had a couple of free hours as the rest of the group did sociology and was told i could not just sit in the cafe and relax so said i could retake ENGLISH lit again bit gobsmacked has it was not possible to attend the lessons d ue to other commitments so i said “I could teach myself if the teacher met me every now and then to tell me what to read errr this was liking asking for the moon and sun and stars but i persuaded them i could do it myself and so she did like the big red hen and throughly enjoyed myself reading hardy and war poets which had touched in at school and surprise surprise was well and well-loved the exam and got b which i was made you have prob noticed grammar is my downfall but don’t care i had passed and remembering the english teacher seeing me in the corridor and saying wow imagine what you would have got if came to the lessons and then why dont u take it further errrr no i have passed and that’s cool but i read cos enjoy it and having all these letters and exams mean well nothing well all i can safely say a picture paints a thousand words for suggesting exams mean nothing but it is true
lets just say it is interesting to learn through our mistakes and perhaps should have first time round informed the exam person that was not well !!! but still
I think the grip of perfection takes ahold and people miss out when they think we have to be the best at what we do i used to run races mainly 10k i enjoyed them and the camaraderie of the runners but did not want to be a world class runner i just enjoyed it so used to get really upset when people would say if u trained more u could be really good as far as i was concerned was good as i wanted and it helped with health problems maybe should give it another shot .
My times at running races did slowly improve which was pleased at but that’s what think should aim for in life quiet steady progress who wants perfection when u reach the top the only thing left is the way down !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!