I am hopeless at making decisions to put it in the simplest form i deciding what to have for breakfast tend to make weetabix / porridge and sprinkle loads of other cereal type things all over the p place very rarely do i have just one type of cereal !!
One of my pet hates ( actually have loads ) is what do you do or what do you see yourself doing in the future have no idea think it is a miracle get through a day never made do something with it survive this sounds a bit over the top but you will never reside inside my head and torment ( doing violin thing again )
I was asked this question in a different manner awhile back and I liked it as gave me something to visualize and think ” what way is your horse heading ” so imagine the horse and you are racing along perhaps it just want to go more slowly and sniff and ponder must admit used to annoy me taking my dog down the road as took so long sniffing everything in sight but suppose just enjoying the moment and of course the sniff !
The day before we decided to put poppy to sleep we took her to a local beach caldy on the Wirral as a puppy we let her off the lead and she ran like mad in to the mud and thought at one point was going to run across the estuary and was away in the moment chasing the birds years later we took her to the same beach were she used to like to jump and chase the butterflies but just sat by the bench and stared at us with her big brown eyes far to tired to care anymore of course animals but don’t speak as such but we can learn so much of how they live their lives yer just sleep eat and walk !!!
to make a decison in life you have to pause and just see what your inner self is saying such as committing to something to something on the phone but in actual torment once you have said yes i really must get into the habit of saying can i let u know it is very difficult to make decisions knowing that can effect the rest of your life my middle niece is 15 and works in a hotel but ask what she is going to do she just laughs no idea her younger sister has recently broken her arm and has decided she is going to design cards for people who are ill to make them happy sounds great but the other week it was going to go on BRITAINS got talent with her cat which was going to come out of a box oh to be that age and really believe in all these dreams that are going to come true.
alot of our struggles in life come from previous experiences and have let with some sort of inner fear turmoil in an art class at about the age of 12 the teacher tore my piece of work up and said “it was utter rubbish ” yer it was never going to go in an art gallery but took me ages to do and i was the artist maybe i meant to be all out of sync and the wrong way round , so this puts me off doing any thing arty as it is like opening the wound yet again .
The fear also comes from wanting to be safe which is like the ego shouting out loudly NO no lou don’t do art although sometimes and dabbled when I have made it very clear just let me do own thing !!!!!!
I have in the past worked with young children and some one said to me why do always head for the craft table when you hate art so much ummm but the kids don’t know that i am prob at the same standard at the 3/5 year old but we are just in the moment cutting and sticking so yer do your own thing and ride that horse !
so i guess next time a big decision just sit and wait and listen and does the inner horse want to slow down or zoom off on a gallop rushing into the decison or what like more anything slowly going along taking everything you meet in your stride be curious in the journey but nothing stopping you if you feel the journey to much turning the horse round and gallop back home ( bit corny that but you get the picture now then to make a cup of tea / coffee discision