threats and the brain reacts

I  have  suffered  from   ptsd slightly  since the   age of  13  and   full blown for over a   decade   with ocd  most of my  life but   just  discovered   got pure  ocd    as well   which is actually a  relief to me  as  at least i know   their  is a reason   that  I think all these  horrendous   thoughts !!!

The  main reason  for this   m any brain  experts   reckon   come  from yeons  ago   when mankind lived   in  caves  and well    they  had to be  alert  for most of the  time otherwise   disaster  could  strike  such   as  eaten by I don’t  know   a lion or something of  that  nature   the  brain had to be  alert  otherwise  no   more  little  BILLY !!!!

If   a   lion  comes  near to u  your brain  reacts with  chemicals  such as   adrenaline  and  cortisol      which is fine   if  going to be  eaten  up   as  you know to run off but  if  someone  scams   you  in the  internet  world  then  the  chemicals  stay  in yr body   i reckon   that  is  why  i am  on alert   system all the  time    and   if  anyone   comes   round  the  corner  unexpectedly  i over react with  a giant     scream   cos   i see   any shock  as  a threat   even   when it is harm less

I f u get  over the  what ever   is  upsetting  you   the brain   is  again  flooded  with  dopamine and   you  feel  relaxed   and  warm and fluffy   but   this    can also   cause probs   later on.

ocd    often  develops as  the   brain  thinks   as to something over  and over   to be safe   i  am forever   getting  books   even on kindle  but have always  been in   dread of  having  nothing to read  although i am told   constantly  i could  stay at  home  til  110   but still would not  read them  i  have to certain  places   out   otherwise  get distressed   saying this  not sure   which is ocd or   aspergers    think they   are supposed to   be distant cousins   when  a  person with  ocd   repeats an action  it supposed;y  calms   down the  anxiety  of  not   repeating the  action but actually  there is  no threat at all   if i did  not   walk    round    the library  nothing  would   go wrong I  know  deep down   nothing will happen but    just kinda  have to  check all  is well  with the books  used to   always   take   unpopular  books   home  with me   as felt as   doing them a favour  and trip out  by  leaving the  library  shelves.

I  often dream  of having a  day  or pushing it  a bit    a week /month  without  these thoughts  but    that  is just   dreaming of world  peace  just wont happen but   we  can all do   our bit  n been told  to beat  this kind of   disorder  is ignore   it  umm like  a   horn   blaring in the  street

whilst trying to sleep  !!!   sigh    need a cuppa   too much thought

I  am the  captain  of my  fate    i am the  master of  my soul     deep breaths


About loubyjo

I have all my life been fascinated by words and books especially I used to have this strange idea that I could read every book in the world well maybe just 80% of them . My life can at times be really stressful as suffer my brains wires are all wonky which results in me having aspergers syndrome thats probably where all my crazy ideas spill out from !!!IIIalso have ocd which results in my thoughts getting stuck in my head causing me lots of distress , but hey what is perfection and if i ever met a perfect person it would probably send me fast asleeP AND YOU AS WELL SO iIam hoping to use this blog to let you lnow what it is like to be me !! in the last few years also discovered got ptsd this is were most of probs stem from
This entry was posted in abuse, aspergers, mental health, ptsd, pureocd, stress, Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s