Out of the night that covers me BLACK AS THE PIT FROM POLE TO POLE TO POLE I THANK WHAT EVER GODS may be for my unconquerable soul
In the fell clutch of circumstance i have not winced or cried aloud my head is bludgeoned but umbound unbowed ( ahhhh wrong it is under the bludgeonings of chance my head is bloody but un bowed
who cares if i still get the lines mixed up i went to a reading grp the other day were we were discussing Thomas Hardy were it was said he was a perfectionist you can get different versions of his work and he has changed the wording .
YEy out of the night that covers me yey really feeling that at the mo since Wednesday when is was suggested that i have adhd as well aspergers ocd ptsd ( tiring all this i feel somewhat relieved and although not really not supposed to have done a few of the tests repeatedly on all saying the same thing !!!!
I think their is obviously a fight going n in my head between the labels that have been put on my head but yer i am hyper active even the way i read i get so excited when finish a book and read a chapter of one book and then another the only time i read the same book constantly for an hr is with the reader org were i am happy discussing it and reading it at a relatively slow pace although not as slow as a snail on crutches !!
It is strange as not really upset that say got adhd apparently their is various types as it is a relief as know why their is a million and one thoughts in my head and full of ideas which never really come round to fruition such as deciding to translate all of Shakespeare works a into scouse .
I honestly don’t know what is worse having aspergic head on when i am worrying about everything and just dont want to open my mouth or this suspected adhd when i am talking 9 million to the dozen and feel like a wasp stuck in the jam jar ahhhhhhh
when i am in a grp of people and an idea comes into my head their is no way on this planet that i be quiet i have to air my ideas straight away !!!
BEYOND THIS PLACE OF WRATH AND TEARS LIES THE HORROR OF THE SHADE AHHHH NOOOH ITS LOOMS ALWAYS SAYING LIES INSTEAD OF LOOMS YEY I LOVE THE WORD OF LOoMS SO WHY DOES IT NOT GET INTO MY SKULL ooooh why have i written that last bit in capitals must be over excitement talking about Invictus
Today i went into an horrific hypo not had a o low blood sugar attack for yeons but started off blinding headache then got in a massive nark got some munchies went to bed and my legs arms went totally dead and for all the tea in china or coffee in brazil could not move although this was obviously not really a good day it actually made a pleasant change from fighting mental health probs so reckon got to face facts i am never really going to be well but it leads to an interesting life if nought else be awful to die and say got nought to say about them !!! i have known this happen
Back to invictus though beyond this place of wrath of tears lies the horror o the shade seems if not fighting one ailment i am fighting another so will always be something wrong , but not kidding it was quite pleasant this afternoon lying in bed not able to move as could think always look a the bright side .
well said enough I am the master of my fate I am the captain of my soul one day I or the professionals so called can sort me out or at least have fun trying