Seasons change just like moods !!

It is now the  middle of  August   more or less   but     really  not been a  good summer  well  it   never is   although   when as  kid     don’t remember all  this wetness    and gloom/ doom  but may be looking  through  rose tinted    glasses  !!

I was  thinking   today of  how   you   don’t   really know  were you  are  with the  season go out  in a  t shirt  as it  seems   hot   but   very  soon   i am  diving into  a shop to  get  cheepish   jumper  as    was  living  in the hope  that  the   good  weather   would   stay all  day !!

My moods    are  like the  ever changing mood    I really can’t   think  when  i  have   been  happy   like the  sun  shining    but    even   then  probably become  to hyper  (adhd? add    what ever the  label  is of the moment  just like the  weather  forecasts  doom  and  gloom   if we   actually  get  good  weather  for more that    2 week s

I actually   quite  like the  Autumn and  the   musty  smell  although    always   worry   it    may get  to cold and  living  in a flat  that is  hard to   heat  =  nightmare  !!!

Winter   is   thought  of  with  gloom but   can get    crisp  cold days   but   nothing  worse than  fingers   gone   white  with cold and  can’t  turn  key  to get  into  flat  !!!

Moods   can be likened  to  seasons   winter =  never going  to be   well  , SPRING  =  things  looking up   can only get  better    summer  yey   going  to be   fantastic   right  through  WRONG   oh yer   Autumn   just  feeling   bit  frightened   what   cld  be  ahead   not sure   anxiety    racing .

I   suppose   at the   moment  i am   edging  cautiously   towards   spring   in a strange    way hoping  that   i am diagnosed   with    some    form of add  a then i  can   do something  about     can’t   do  much   if   u  don’t   know    were the  leak is   coming   from    if  get  puddles  on the  floor   so to speak  and  maybe all  will  be hunky dory  !!!!! and the    football  team down the  rd    TRANMERE    WILL   WIN THE   PREMIER  LEAGUE     BUT    we   can all  hope !!!

I suppose   most  people  wld   say spring  is their   fave  season   cos   it    represents  hope  and you  generally feel  fresher   lighter    especially as   all the  heavy   clothes    comes  off   but   as my  Nain   used  to say   never  cast  a cloud   til may is  out       you just don’t  know  what is   going to happen    just like mental health  I never   really    know  what  person   will be  throughout the  day a  real  Jekel and hyde  person!!!

life   seems  more   colourful  in the  spring  and the   flowers  begin to bloom and  of course  the   daffodils    start  to  sway  and   it wont   be long    before   u  hear  the  infamous    daffodil  poem by Wordsworth    and  think we are here  again   spring  the  sleep  of  hibernation is over and we  are    springing into life  the   sun  is shining    birds are  singing  and  we are urged to seize the daY

BEWARE  though spring is like  my mental  health   when i think   well  i have managed   to sort that out    no more   problems     going to   have   a  good time   now  all fixed   but  wham no longer      do  i get used  to one   syndrome  illness   disorder  got used to  being   aspergic  diabetic   lets    try    stomach  heart  adhd pavola   it is never  ending   but     hope  is what  i have    like  spring  one day  they will sort   everything out and  i will  have the   summer   everyone  talks of   1976    but even that   had it    downer  apparently  swarms of  ladybirds .

the   seasons   are  all in the  mind  spring  summer     autumn    winter  and  you   really  cant be   sure  what  season it will be  tomorrow   just  like  living  with   various  health   conditions  oh well at least    it is  interesting    and   up   to me   what i do   for i am the   master of  my soul  I am the   captain  of my fate !!!

Came across   a quote the other  day   by   someone  Henry miller    not sure    who he is who   cares !!!!    The aim of life is  to live and to  live means to  be aware  joyously divinely aware   !!!   yer  stop   and smell the  roses


About loubyjo

I have all my life been fascinated by words and books especially I used to have this strange idea that I could read every book in the world well maybe just 80% of them . My life can at times be really stressful as suffer my brains wires are all wonky which results in me having aspergers syndrome thats probably where all my crazy ideas spill out from !!!IIIalso have ocd which results in my thoughts getting stuck in my head causing me lots of distress , but hey what is perfection and if i ever met a perfect person it would probably send me fast asleeP AND YOU AS WELL SO iIam hoping to use this blog to let you lnow what it is like to be me !! in the last few years also discovered got ptsd this is were most of probs stem from
This entry was posted in adhd, aspergers, mental health. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s