I dont like phones i dont like them ringing and not to keen on ringing people up seems crazy in this phonemad world but their u go nought so queer as folk they make me nervous and think for ages before phoning people although a relief after committed self !!!
I was not feeling to bad consider the escapades with my dad and off i toddled for a catch up with Dr about ocd intrusive thoughts / ptsd otherwise known as the hell inside my head before planning to go and get my dad some more gear for hosi i was feeling okish and so the dr said come back in a month to check up on things as had been going fortnightly although i dont really get on with medical people or otherwise unless tuned into my sense of humour not keen on drs etc who stare at the computer screen !! instead of looking at me but still i heard the mobile off yuk nooooh i had things on mind were was it and was all hands /arms as looked for it did not get to it in time and then managed to get the caller it was my mum telling me my dad was coming out of hosi tomorrow prob note the prob but this was today not tomorrow the news cld have waited til arrived back with the mission of new pjs etc but then all hell broke out in cld not find my little holder with bus pass money cards and my precious library card which meant ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh and again ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh and worse it was lost and would have to go through the rigmarole of new cards for everything and hsbcmz hbskzd,xn vmb\.eanzmdv xc and other unpronounceable words shld not ring me were had i put i stormed back up the hill home and a friend shouted out from their step ” is yr dad ok seeing my ” i am going to explode and a bit worried how loud my djasghjsvwohsjvn was ” yer fine its just have lost my pass and everything , i arrived back at at parents why did u ring me aahhhhhhh thought u would want to know about yr dad noooooooh cld have waited ahhhhhh and then i went up stairs and guess what their was my special package with all my cards in aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah deep breath all is well with the word and i can breathe again and not long off toddled of for new pjs with strict instruction dont ring me i dont care
so thats how i am everything in the right place than lose something or a phone call out of the blue and the world with in my head totally explodes i calm down pretty quick but it is always rather worrying who has seen me in this state !!! what i would do for a life which just ambled along i often think how nice it would be in a residential home were u went for little trips and was all cosy and watched tv with no worries of the outside world .
I was all calm and waiting for my big bro to arrive from wales when the dreaded phone went again it was a lady from adhd services sounding hopeful i said i was Louise thinking it was going to be shorter than the 18 months for help with adhd /add but no hocus pocus it was asking if wanted to stay on the waiting list as now the waiting list had gone up to 3 year AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH wha how long course i want to stay on the list but why is it so long is it the Rory bremner ( wotever) effect , the lady said this was the way things were and with aahhhhh keep me on the list i put the phone down .
i was fuming and stamped about alot always helps before cld explode to much big bro arrived with little Eva and off to visit dad in hosi were i spent most of the time in cafe with Eva who realised that a n ill grandad was not the same as a well one at home ahhh deep breath tomorrow is another day or as i prefer to say
i am the master of my fate i am the captain of my soul ho hum